That day you were all I could think about. God has such a plan for you. I woke up that Monday morning with a feeling that I had to know if this was real. Your Daddy and I planned to wait until Tuesday when his project at work was finished, I think we already knew.
I took your brothers to the store. Landon and Ezra could not wait to get treats and check out the cars. As I checked out, I thought about going home and knowing that first sign that your arrival would be in the next year. Oh, how my heart sunk. What a blessing. God, thank you for your blessings on us.
On my way home thoughts of joy and thoughts of fear came over me. As the boys drift off to sleep, I sing, “You are faithful, God You are faithful.”
We get home and I couldn’t wait any longer. I pray, “God, may Your will be done. Whatever Your will is, is what’s best.” Chills. All over. The Holy Spirit reminded me of the scriptures I wrote down just days before. “Do not be afraid. And do not be anxious.”
“Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest.”Joshua 1:9
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
“This is why You showed me so clearly that I am to live a fearless life!” Wow, thank you God for Your Word.
I pray again, “Your will Lord, Your way. Give me the strength that only comes from you.”
There it is, two pink lines. My heart sunk. I feel joy, I feel fear…. “God, with you I have nothing to fear.” I go to our bedroom and fall to my knees. “God, please help me. Please help me. I can’t do this without you. I don’t want to fear because I know you are near.” In Isaiah 41:10 he tells us, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
I cry tears of joy and still shocked. Your Daddy and I knew that I was craving Cookout chicken nuggets and Barq’s rootbeer for a reason. Haha And Mommy has been so tired.
But then ever so faithful and true… I’m covered by thoughts and feelings of
“Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.” John 14:27
I can feel you near God. I know You are there.
His love sings over me. Tremendous peace. Praise His Holy Name!
“The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.” Zephaniah 3:17
I’m in awe of the peace He gives us. He is always with us.
I go and look at the pregnancy test again on the sink. In our bathroom we have hung on the wall, Psalm 46, I begin to pray this out loud;
“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling.”
So, here is the start of our adventure together, my precious baby! You are my third baby! I’d have to say, you are quite the surprise. I cannot wait to meet you, hold you and tell you all about Jesus. I know your brothers will adore you and I cannot wait for them to meet you either.
Your Daddy was surprised and overjoyed to hear about you. He said, “God has blessed us so much. He is going to take care of us.”
God designs everything for a purpose. Don’t ever forget you are beautifully and wonderfully made. We are all loved by Him.
Only by His strength,